Being called selfish doesn’t feel like a compliment, but the trait
can actually make you a better person, psychology experts say. "When you
take care of yourself first, you show up as a healthy, grounded person in life,"
says Bob Rosen, author of Grounded:
How Leaders Stay Rooted in an Uncertain World.
Selfish is an ugly word but it can mean two different things. One
connotation is that might come off as unkind and sometimes inconsiderate of
others. The other is that you take responsibility for getting your personal,
emotional and physical needs met, and that’s an important part of becoming an
adult." Oriented around survival, it’s in our nature to take care of our
own needs first.
The key to healthy selfishness is being self-focused instead
of self-involved. Schedule some "me time," and you might discover
these four benefits:
Selfish people tend to take better care of themselves instead of
giving too much energy away serving the needs of everyone else, says Rosen. He
interviewed several executives for his book and found strong physical health to
be a common trait of a good leader.
Studies have shown that acting in your own self-interest may give
you an advantage in leadership roles. Selfish people are more confident and
less likely to give up on goals. They go after what they want unapologetically,
and they’re not afraid to ask for the raise or promotion. Selfish people have a drive to succeed.
People will have a harder time manipulating or taking advantage of
you if you’re selfish. Setting boundaries means knowing where you end and other
person begin. If you have trouble being self-focused, you might have trouble
saying no. To be a healthy, grounded person, you need to be selfish. Looking
for someone to cater to your emotional needs makes your relationships
vulnerable.
Selfish people spend their time doing activities they like to do.
If you have a well-developed sense of who you are, what you enjoy and the
ability to communicate this to others, you’ll be a happier person. Putting
yourself first is not a negative quality; it’s your job to take care of yourself
and get what you need.
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